I molested 6 butterflies tonight
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I came so hard my ears popped.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
