Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
