you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
