why didn't you poke me back
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
