Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize