i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
