You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
