There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
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