The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
You are a genius and a whore.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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