Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
