one two three fourrrrnication!
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
