Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
