her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
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