belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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