Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
