38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
