I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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