Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Randomize
