oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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