Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
