drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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