It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
You don't make any sense
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