What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
