She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
