Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Randomize
