i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
