Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
