Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
