i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
