Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
