It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I would ride that face into the sunset
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
