No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Randomize