I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
We have so much sex to catch up on
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize