from now on my penis is your penis
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize