I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
