the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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