so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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