It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
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