So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
