1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize