yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
