A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Randomize
