just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
