porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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