that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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