it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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