We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Randomize
