HIV tests are more positive than that guy
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
