I didn't shave. On purpose
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
