ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
