My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Randomize
